Monday, July 24, 2017

why the bachelorette made me upset

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*do not read if you haven’t caught up on the current Bachelorette series because this contains spoilers!!*

When I think about Monday’s, three things usually come to mind: coffee, fresh start, and the Bachelorette.

While I think the base line of the Bachelor/Bachelorette is kind of far-fetched (not judging anyone who gets engaged quickly; I just think the majority of this show is meant for publicity, not for someone to find love), I do enjoy watching it and listening to my husband make fun of this guy getting punched or this girl throwing a tantrum worthy of a two-year-old’s trophy.

But, this last week made me rethink how I feel about the Bachelor series.

I know this could sound silly to those from a different background than me, and that’s fine. I understand that we are all different and that’s what makes our stories unique. But to me, it wasn’t silly. Not at all.

Last week we watched as Rachel attended hometowns, specifically Dean’s. I like Rachel, and I think she’s a great woman. But I don’t think she fully understood what was being asked of Dean to attend his hometown during the show, with a billion people watching.

I come from a family that was torn to shreds a long time ago. I’m not just talking about my parents being divorced, although that certainly isn’t a small thing. I’m talking about a family that literally tore each other to shreds every moment they got and made my life a living hell until I “escaped” when I put my foot down and walked away. Not looking for a pity party here, just giving background to why this show affected me how it did.

Anyway, back to the point.

During the last show, it was clear that Dean wanted nothing to do with going back to his hometown. While I don’t personally know Dean or the specific details of his feelings, I do know what it’s like to be submerged into family issues unwillingly.

I felt incredibly sad for him, knowing that he had to do this not only to stay on the show, but in front of thousands and thousands of people that were watching the most personal moment of his life aired on TV.

If you watched the episode, then you know it didn’t go well. It was very apparent that Dean was hurt, angry, and frustrated by the time the night was over. However, I had some hope left for the evening when he told Rachel he was falling in love with her, and she responded with something similar.

At the end of the show, you can just ask Kyle: I was literally praying that Rachel wouldn’t send him home, not because I wanted him to stay on the show (which I did, I like him better than everyone but Peter), but because I could only imagine how he felt going through allllll of that mess with his parents, and then having to go home as if it were all for nothing.

And what’ll you know, Rachel sent him home.

I know Rachel feels the way Rachel feels, and I’m not blaming Rachel for sending him home (although I think it was crap that she told him, in so many words, that she was starting to fall for him and then turned around with BYE FELICIA) but anyway.

I think it was really, really horrible that ABC made Dean go through hometowns, on public television, and rip that bandaid off a wound the size of texas... for what? Rachel to send him home to deal with both a broken family and a broken heart??

I knowwww, I just know that some of you are shaking your heads that I’m being silly. "It's just a TV show," I can hear you say.

Well it's not just a TV show when you're talking about someone's broken family. If you have come from a family that didn’t hold up the definition of “family”, well then, I think you just might understand.

Basically, what I’m saying here, is that the network went too far in the name of publicity. If Rachel and Dean ended up together in the end, her meeting his family should have been reserved for afterwards and not with cameras watching their every move. 

I haven’t been watching this show for a super long time, so I don’t know if there has been any situations like this before, but I think an exception could have been made. 

Again, this is just how I feel and it may have hit me harder than it should. But yeah, I'm upset by the situation.

If you watch the Bachelorette, how did you feel about Dean's hometown episode??


  1. I'm totally with you-felt very wrong to watch how it all unfolded! xo, Biana-BlovedBoston

  2. I was soooo upset! This is the first season I have actually sat down and watched and I was shocked. I would have much rather seen Dean to the end, or at least had been picked over Peter that week, cuz we all know he won't even say he loves her, ugh! *rant over*

    1. I really wish he would have made it to the end, too! Everyone kept saying that he was too young to be that serious, but I think he knew exactly how he felt!