Monday, February 22, 2016

two lines | one year ago

Today is a special day, as one year ago today, we found out we were pregnant with our sweet little baby.

Cue all the feels.

I remember that day so vividly. Part of me feels like it’s been years since that day, and the other part of me feels like it was yesterday.

K literally had to talk me into, okay make me, take a pregnancy test. After months and months of trying, I didn’t want to see another negative. So I flat out refused to take one, even though K insisted every day that I didn’t get my period.

By the time K finally made me take one, I hadn’t had a period for 50 days (okay maybe I should have tested sooner, haha). But after struggling with PCOS for so long, I figured it was just another month of a screwy period.

K insisted so much that Sunday morning after I woke up with incredibly sore boobs and mild nausea, I grabbed a pregnancy test and ran to the bathroom and peed on the stick.

I didn’t want to watch it because I didn’t want to watch that one single line pop up, so I turned the other way while K watched it.

About .028456 seconds later (I may be exaggerating a bit, but it was seriously so quick), I heard K say, “It has two lines.”

There are no words to describe the rush of emotions that I felt as he said those words. I grabbed the test and screamed, and then started crying because I just couldn’t believe it. 

Then of course I proceeded to take 5 billion more tests just to make sure. And then I checked them about 12 times each to make sure they all said positive.

I went to the doctor that week to confirm the pregnancy with an ultrasound, where we saw our tiny, tiny little baby with a heart beat of 120 bpm.

The day I found out I was pregnant was so magical. I thanked God more times that I could count, and prayed so much that this would be a healthy pregnancy. I was flooded with emotions- love, happiness, shock, fear. There isn’t one word to describe how I felt.

But I was so incredibly in love already. + I’m still so incredibly in love with our beautiful, (almost) five month old baby girl.

My oh my how one year changes things.

{Praise the Lord. Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good; His love endures forever. -Psalm 106:1.}

xoxo, Brandi

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